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Ode to a "Bertie Ahern" retirement paradise..
 national |
politics / elections |
opinion/analysis
 Saturday June 04, 2005 15:21 by John McDermott - removefiannafail Gran Canaria, Spain
Pray ..you never will go there.!
I want to get out of this place.
 if heaven is not my home,Bertie will look after me. When you are old and grey
and nodding by a fireside way,
take down this book and slowly read
of those who died in painful need.
Of the horrid Leas Cross, "nursing home",
where old folk suffered all alone.
The ribbon was cut in 98...
Bertie,s scissors sealed their fate!
The owners, J. & G. Aherne,
the world was soon about to learn,
.were bosom pals of " Fianna Fail",
But R.T.E. was their downfall,
Poor wretches there, were left to die
In a pricey home with fees sky high.
Oh what cost , to suffer here,!
45000 euros,- paid each year.!
Bertie opened up this place,
(We pray we never have to face.)
Two years later this new scheme-
Of Jim Aherne, was caught between,
The Revenue,- and a hard place.!
He had to face the sad disgrace,
of paying fines and income tax
because he was a little lax...
He paid 600,000 euros over,
An awful lot of poor man,s clover!.
The outcome however was a dream,
He applied for the nursing home tax incentive scheme.!
Bertie gave him back his cash
His beds increased from then,- three fold
so going straight,and not being bold,
increased his profits- by tenfold.!
(But pray,- you will not here, grow old.!)
Half a mill. he cleared this year..
an honest man it would appear.!
Cheap labour sourced from overseas,
has boosted profits-no more sleaze.!
The moral is; pay Bert his due
and dosh to you- it will accrue.!
Every crook this lesson learn-
pay your partner, Bertie Ahern.!
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Comments (1 of 1)
Jump To Comment: 1if you want to avoid such an end-
you could try driving dangerously,
armed robbery of post offices,
smoking cigarettes,
drinking alcohol excessively,
sharing needles with as many other drug user as possible.
do not just take loads of crystal meth it'll give you alzhemiers.
we all want to avoid alzhemiers, which is why as members of the economic underclass we must
do our best to break the laws which would ensure our long life ending in incontinence in a state home by dying before PENSIONS.
or else we ought support stem cell search and embryonic experimentation in the vague hope that by the time our brains are turning to mush, therapy will have got past the R&D stage and be made freely available to poorer people who didn't drive dangerously enough, never tried robbing a post office or getting on a list, smoked cigarettes, turned to the dhrink, spiked themselves with hiv but did do ice.
(I would have loved to have written this in alexandrines but I'm more a blank verse man myself)