POLITBURO MEMBER THREATENS TO INFORM ON 'COUNTER-REVOLUTIONARIES'

national | miscellaneous | news report Wednesday June 25, 2003 22:11 by Evelyn de Courcy-Smythe - Knit In Our Name

Party-Boy Flips For The Fuzz

Eavesdropping on a recent meeting between a well-known member of the Dublin politburo(who shall remain nameless) and some other leather-clad street musicians,I was rather taken aback to hear him threaten to counter-act any jokes or otherwise "reactionary activism", by alerting the hitherto overtly despised Garda Siochana/C.I.A.

As I was completing some booties for my thirteenth grandchild,I could not help but overhear this rather strikingly handsome,if a trifle effeminate, young man threaten to inform the Gardai of any activity which was not sanctioned by the Politburo.Complete with standard issue revolutionary leather jacket,Lenin badge and the glazed impenetrable stare that only the true man of political wisdom possesses,It seemed to my wizened ears to be a frightfully incongruous juxtaposition between the book,and it's cover,as it were.
As I strained my withered and leathery neck to better harvest further illicit aural tid-bits from the "dialogue" between our future comrade leader and his hypnotised lackeys,I was as flabbergasted as a woman of my years can be to hear an admission by this same inspirational leader that anyone who didn't agree with everything he said was a counter-revolutionary,and thus subject to extreme machiavellian measures to eliminate them.When pressed on this matter by another dashing(albeit in need of a haircut)young chap,our future comrade leader stated in no uncertain terms that THE POLICE would be informed.
Despite my advanced years,I have been accused of being rather naive at times.Perhaps it is a manifestation of this naivety that I am confused by this young mans double standards.I also confess that I am rather worried by the seemingly undemocratic sewing-circlesque means of securing a place on the Politburo that seems to favour zealous young yes-comrades over those with anything to say other than "Da".
"Are you crazy?",I hear you ask."Do you not fear the secret police?".I am old,my race is run,my knitting almost completed.What can they do to me that time has not already done?I may stand frail and twisted in the face of blind consensus imposed upon us by a self appointed comrade-leader,but I stand nevertheless.There is nothing more dangerous than an immoveable political philosophy that goes unchallenged.It always results in the wants of the few outweighing the needs of the many.It will not be long until I go for my final subteraennean snooze,so when I am gone,don't say I didn't warn you,you cheeky young pups.